What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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