So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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