But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize