When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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