yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
there is glitter all over my balls
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
