: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
