So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Randomize
