all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize