I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I stole a fireplace last night.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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