At least make sure they are 18
Why
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
