I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
