i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
She told me I should be a condom model.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
