I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Randomize
