Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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