question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize