friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Life without a bra equals bliss.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Randomize