Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Randomize
