ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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