Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
