Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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