i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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