hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize