Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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