everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize