roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize