Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
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