theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
