none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
