i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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