Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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