My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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