Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize