Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
