dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
