I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
