I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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