You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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