oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize