: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
