I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
People in love make me want to vomit
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
