I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize