Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I have fence marks all over my body
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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