I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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