Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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