I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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