I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
