Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
