I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize