do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
