im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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